


All Men Are Beasts

by thegayhomosexual



Category: Taxi (TV)
Genre: 70s sitcom, Bobby lowkey likes Tony, But not quite, Dennis is an issue, Elaine is a good friend, Everything is almost the same, Louie is an ass, M/M, They all are taxi cab workers, Tony lowkey likes Bobby, Tony needs help, cause thats the original thing, gay relationships, if u squint theres tobby (bobby and tony), its p much 1x10 but tony’s gf is a bf, so genderbend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 13:53:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28744299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegayhomosexual/pseuds/thegayhomosexual
Summary: Tony is having relationships issues and his best friend helps him.
Relationships: Tony Banta/Bobby Wheeler, Tony Banta/Original Male Character
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	All Men Are Beasts

Tony pursed his lips in irritation, sitting on the bench in the garage at work next to Latka. Tony was silent for the most part, too lost in his own thoughts to notice the chaos around him. Bobby was arguing with Alex and John, Louie was yelling at workers like usual. No big deal, except there was one big deal. Dennis came back.

Dennis came back and wouldn’t leave him alone, the more Tony thought about it the more stressed he became. Picking at the wood of the small bench he sat on, he interrupted his own words that tried to spill out of his lips. “Latka,” Tony announced, he must have not been loud enough because it didn’t catch his friend’s attention. With swift movement, Tony got up, turning around on his heel before pulling on Latka’s legs from under the car so his friend was forced to acknowledge Tony’s existence and very visible distraught attitude. Naturally, Latka showed curiosity as much as worry. It was never a good thing when Tony got upset, out of the whole group, Tony was the most easy going. Nothing could anger him, or even upset him. Tony sighed, rubbing the palm of his hand into his eye as his other hand rested on his hip. “I got issues, Latka. I need help. There’s this guy I used to see, and now he’s back.” Latka began to ramble in his first language, Tony only assumed was advice so he nodded. It was kind of funny, without knowing what Latka was saying—he knew what Latka was saying.

Tony pursed his lips, nodding as he mused, “How do I know what you’re saying without actually knowing what you’re saying, Latka?”

Latka began to ramble again, Tony couldn’t help but smile as he rested his hand on Latka’s shoulder. “Well, thanks, Latka. I appreciate it.” And with that, Tony walked away. He made his way to the phone, punching in the digits of Dennis’ phone number. Antsy as ever, unable to stand in place, Tony ran his fingers through his hair as a heavy exhale had fallen out of his lips.

“Hey, Dennis. Yeah,” Tony nodded, forcing the words out with a shaky voice. “It’s me.”

“Me?” He heard through the phone, Tony rolled his eyes as he pointed to himself as he cocked his hip to the side in frustration.

“Y’know me,” Tony spoke out, “Me!” The italian wasn’t always the best talker, sure at times he could be smooth but sometimes it was difficult. Sometimes, shit, most of the time. But, the boy sure tried. 

Resting his free hand on the phone machine, Tony rested his forehead on his knuckles as he bit his lip so hard that he tasted metal. “I was wonderin’ if you’d meet me at the diner, I got something I wanna tell you.” Tony started, he licked his lips as Bobby made eye contact with him. A shit-eating grin playing at the blond’s lips as he leaned back on his chair in the garage with his arms crossed. Sometimes Bobby did this just to rile Tony up, and, most of the time it absolutely worked. Not even paying attention to what Dennis was saying, he lightly dismissed Dennis to make it seem like he was paying attention.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll see you there.” Tony then put the phone back on the machine, immediately cutting the call off. Bobby got up, Alex must have read Tony’s mind because he didn’t get up—all he did was nod then go back to shuffling his deck of cards.

Elaine was too busy talking to Johnny, he was internally grateful because he couldn’t take all four of them playfully bullying him to try to see what he’s so frustrated about. He was glad they weren’t going to poke his shoulders and antagonize him. He mentally prepared himself as Bobby made his way to him and the phone, the blond narrowed his eyes in a way as if he was reading Tony’s expression.

“Girl troubles.” Bobby mused.

“Boy troubles,” Tony sucked in his breath, correcting the taller male. Bobby’s eyebrows raised, nodding in amusement as he hummed.

“Didn’t know you swing that way.” Bobby smiled, amusement lingering even more in his voice which only made Tony huff in annoyance. Bobby laughed, slapping Tony on the back.

“Alright, alright. What’s going on?”

“There’s this guy—“ Tony started, only to get interrupted by an annoying Bobby.

“Ah, a guy!” Tony then glared at the blond, Bobby putting his hands up in the air as the italian slugged him.

“Like I was sayin’,” Tony began. He rubbed his hands together, closing his eyes before speaking again. “A guy I used to see, came back. But the thing is, I thought I already made it clear that I don’t want to see him. And, he’s stubborn.”

“So,” Bobby knew there was more, he was just trying to push Tony a little.

“So, I’m gonna meet him at the diner.”

Bobby hummed, rubbing his back neck as thoughts swam in his head. He got an idea.

“What if I come with you?” Bobby thought out loud, “I mean, if things get bad. I’ll interrupt the both of you so we can leave.” No big deal, right?

Tony sighed in relief, resting his forehead on Bobby’s shoulder with his eyes closed. Bobby patted him on the back, smiling softly.

“Let’s leave before he finds his way to our work.” Bobby interrupted their moment, Tony opening his eyes as he ran his fingers through his hair with a nod.

“Yeah.” Tony walked out the garage, Bobby following him, both of them ignoring stares from the rest of the group. The blond caught up to the brunet, slinging his arm around his shoulder as they both made their way to the diner.

Already entering the diner, Tony examined the place inch by inch and he didn’t see Dennis. He sighed in worry, Bobby reading his mind so he ruffled the italian’s hair as if to say ‘don’t sweat it’. Tony softly smiled, nodding as Bobby went to the counter to announce to the guy in the front that there will be a table for three, and that they’re waiting for another person. Afterwards, the two made their way to the table by the booths. Bobby sitting down with no worry in his mind, Tony the absolute opposite. Stiff and fidgety, Tony looked around as he swallowed the invisible horse pill in his throat. His throat felt dry so he politely asked a waiter who walked by for an iced water. Tony’s heart dropped as Dennis walked in with a bright smile on his face, wearing a black and grey scarf with his brown curls complimenting his cheekbones. Blue eyes that were wild, Bobby looked at the entrance door and hummed.

“You got a nice type,” Bobby lightly joked, trying to break the ice. Tony rolled his eyes as he shot an annoyed look at Bobby before fixing his attitude as he got up to greet Dennis. Dennis walked over, happy as ever, unaware of the bad news. Tony went in for a hug but that was brief, it turned into a kiss that lingered a little longer than what Tony wanted. Bobby held in his laugh, standing up as he fixed his pants. Dennis looked at Bobby, a wide smile playing on his thinner lips as he shook the blond’s hand.

“Well, it is a pleasure to meet you.” Bobby smooth-talked, looking over at Tony, leaning in to whisper a joke.

“Isn’t he a doll?” Bobby snorted, Tony elbowing him to shut him up, the italian internally screaming for a way out instead of having to confront the situation handed to him.

Tony sighed, running his fingers through his hair as he gestured to the table.

“So, sit down.” Tony shyly spoke, Dennis complying as Bobby sat back down as well. All three of them now at the table. It was almost a nice transition until Dennis grabbed the chair and scooted close to Tony, it was almost as if the man didn’t understand personal space. Bobby silently took note in this.

Tony began to speak, “So, um.” Tony huffed in annoyance as Dennis rested his chin on Tony’s shoulder as his sly hand now rested on the italian’s thigh. This man definitely did not respect personal space, Tony tightly smiled, forcing himself to stay polite through the uncomfortable experience as Bobby took silent pity.

“I think we should-“ Tony was interrupted by Dennis’ hands leaving him to reach inside his pocket for a pill. The waiter had come back with the iced water, Tony was about to lean in to grab the glass, hoping his dry throat was the problem and maybe he’d calm down but nope—Dennis rudely grabbed the glass, popping the pill in his mouth before swallowing with water running down his throat. Bobby’s eyebrows raised in surprise for what could have been the hundredth time today.

“We need to stop seeing each other,” Tony blurted out, for some reason the water being the last straw as Bobby’s eyes widened at the lack of smoothness. Dennis choked on the water before blurting out laughing with his wrist pressed against his lips.

“W-what?” Dennis started, unable to complete a sentence from the bubbles of laughter. “What is this all about?” Dennis sat up, not believing Tony for a minute.

“I want us to stop seeing each other, Dennis.” Tony sat up straight, putting his hands on the table only for Dennis to rest his hands on top of the brunet’s. Tony felt like he wasn’t being taken seriously, which really upset him. Bobby couldn’t blame him, he felt bad for Tony. He knew the smaller man wasn’t the best at communicating properly when it came to emotions but jeez—the guy can’t even sternly stick up for himself. 

Tony was now even more frustrated as he shook Dennis’ hands off his own, licking his lips as he looked around the room.

“We’re done, I thought I couldn’t stand being without you but-“

Dennis completely ignored the actual problem, staring at Tony in awe. Delusionally, he rested his chin in his hand, baby talking as he squished Tony’s cheek.

“Tony boy can’t live without me, awh. How romantic.” Dennis chuckled only for Tony to respond gruffly,

“But,” Boldly stating before continuing, “It turns out i can and I’m perfectly fine without ya’.” Bobby rested his leg over the other, his hands resting in his lap as his lips pursed awkwardly. The blond started to feel the tension rise.

Dennis looked a little baffled, before a smile slowly creeping up on his face. Bobby cleared his throat, grabbing Tony with him as he got up.

“We’ll see you around, Dennis. It’s getting late, we gotta go.” Bobby announced, Tony complying, wanting nothing more than to get out of there.

“It was nice to meet you, Bobby.” Dennis smiled politely, acting as if Tony didn’t just break things off. The two made their way out of the diner.

Following the next day, Tony had walked in looking a little rough as he walked to Louie to hand him the money he had worked for. Nineteen dollars. One, Nine dollars. Louie looked offended as the cash had been given to him, crinkling his nose up as he looked at the cash then at Tony.

“That’s it, meat-head?” Louie gruffed, only for Tony to stare at him.

“It’s been rough, okay? It’s been a long day for me.”

“All i hear is you complainin’, how you gonna get work done, okay, if you whine like a spoilt brat?” Louie tossed the cash on the counter before resting his hands on there.

“You changed my shift!” Tony defended only for Louie to roll his eyes.

“Listen, if you were anybody else I’d slap the shit outta ya—but, we’re both italian. So, I’m gonna talk to you the same way I’d talk to my brother.” Louie leaned in, narrowing his eyes before continuing, “Do better, meatball.”

Tony huffed, walking off only to plop on the chair next to John and Alex playing cards.

The italian heard muffled conversations, then a really excited Louie which was odd because since when was the bum ever happy?

“Oh, if I wasn’t into broads, perhaps I’d marry ya!” Louie laughed, staring at the money in his hand. Louie slammed the green crate that was by the desk to get Tony’s attention.

“Look at my new worker, meatball. He got me 217 cash! Do ya hear me?! Dennis, I’m tellin’ you, you are great!” Louie spoke loudly.

Bobby who sat on one of the cabs looked at Tony the same time the italian looked back at him, both eyes wide as dish plates before they stood up, Tony tripping over the chair before making his way towards Dennis, in a hushed voice, growling, “Why are you at my work?!”

“I work here, I’m your co-worker, silly.” Dennis smiled, leaning in to peck the italian on his lips. Tony wanting no part in the kiss so he just stood still. Dennis ran his fingers through Tony’s thick hair, Bobby rubbing his hands into his eyes as he groaned to himself. How could this get possibly worse?

Tony pushed Dennis off him, “I have to go to the bathroom.” Tony interrupted Dennis’ kisses with a sour expression only for Dennis to follow him. Walking towards the bathroom with Dennis behind him, the smaller male looked at Bobby for help.

Once the two came back, Elaine had been explained what happened. She looked at Tony, gesturing him by the phone so she could speak with him. Looking sad and pathetic, in need of help, Tony dragged himself over to the phone after telling Dennis he had to talk to Elaine alone.

“What do y-“

“You look miserable.” Elaine sympathized, shaking her head as she put her hands on her hips.

“What do I do, Elaine? He won’t leave me alone, ask Bobby, he wa-“ Tony had once again been interrupted, Elaine scoffing.

“I know, Tony. Bobby told me everything. You need to be stern with him.” The blue eyed girl reasoned only for Tony to submissively bow his head.

“I can’t be mean to him.” Tony argued only for Elaine to roll her eyes, “You need to, you may not want to, but you need to.”

“Do you want him to keep bothering you?” Elaine continued, Tony silently shook his head as he scratched his arm as he tightened his lips into a straight line.

“So, go.” Elaine pushed the italian, him stumbling but catching himself before he fell.

Walking himself over to Dennis, Tony tapped his shoulder, straightening himself to stand taller. “You need to quit this job, I don’t want to see you here no more.”

Dennis looked at Tony, smiling as he wrapped his arms around the boy’s shoulders loosely. “You’re cute when you act like that.” Tony only shoved him off, interrupting Dennis.

“No, you seriously need to quit. I don’t want you here. I need space, Dennis. I’m not gonna ask again.” 

Dennis scratched his head, raising his brow. His wild eyes matching his attitude once again, “You think I’m gonna quit? I make your boss more money than you can, he won’t want me to leave—quite frankly I don't know if I want to either.” Tony fumed at this, walking over to Louie.

“Fire him, right now. I can’t stand hi-“ Tony was then again interrupted by Louie’s laughter, the smaller italian couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“You think I’m gonna fire him? A worker like him, I want to breed him!” Tony growled at the vulgar language and slammed his hand harder on the crate.

“Goddamn it!” Tony roared, “Shut up and listen to me, I am so tired of not being taken seriously. The only reason why Dennis is even working here is because I am!”

“And he’s in love with someone else!” Elaine announced, desperate more than ever to help her friend.

Louie and Dennis laughed, both amused by Tony’s sudden tantrum. Louie cared about money and Dennis knew this, that’s how he manipulated his way in.

“W-ith, uh.” Elaine stuttered, looking around before pointing to the golden child.

“Him!” Elaine’s finger landed on a particular blond, the man’s eyes widening.

Louie laughed, not believing the situation. “Bobby?!” Louie interrogated. 

“Yes!” Elaine ran over to Bobby, grabbing him by the arm and forcing him over to Tony. Bobby slung his arm tightly around Tony, stiff like the italian.

“I don’t believe this!” Dennis scoffed, Bobby looked down at Tony as he sighed heavily before leaning down to kiss Tony at the corner of his mouth. Tony’s eyes widened before Dennis stood there defeated.

Dennis narrowed his eyes, “Alright, have it that way. Have it exactly like that,” Dennis flipped the bird at Bobby, Tony then at Louie.

Louie cursed under his breath, “By the end of the week both of you knuckleheads owe me 217! And, it’s coming from your paycheck!”

Tony let out a shaky laugh as Bobby rested his forehead on top of the smaller’s head.

“Thanks, babe.” Tony joked, Bobby smiled shyly at that. Slowly moving himself away from the awkward side hug.

“What are friends for?” Bobby shrugged.

Yeah, what are friends for?


End file.
